We Are Headinghome

 For a year and a day I travelled. The scenery around me slowly changed, but not much else did. For most of this time I tried not to think. I tried not to think about the dragon infesting the tower. I tried not to think of how I would go about any rescue attempts.
I came within sight of the tower. For a few days past I had been travelling in inhabited country again, but I had not seen much life about. The tower was however living up to its name and towering high above the rest of the scenery, outlined against the horizon. I reined my horse in and slowed down to a walk as we neared the tower. It was looking suspiciously devoid of life. But then I got close enough to see the stones. There were dragons everywhere! Most were no bigger than the regular lizards that you would find back home in Asharnia, sunbathing on rocks. They squirmed and crawled over the stones, and into the crevices. However, there were also some larger dragons that climbed over all the little ones, sometimes stepping on top of them. These circled around and around the tower, almost like guards on patrol. My heart went cold at the sight of all those dragons. I had been expecting a lot of dragons. But I had not been expecting an infestation on this scale – where they sat on top of each other in the mortar and crawled over each other.
I stepped back and looked at the window at the very top of the tower. I could not see anyone in there, but that did not mean much.


“Ahoy!” I shouted.
There was some movement up there. Then a face leaned out of the window. A very pretty face surrounded by a mess of frizzy blond hair.

I waved and shouted “Hello!”
She waved back. “Are you the third of the three princes?” she shouted back.
“Yes! How did you know?”
“Isn’t it obvious?”
“Well, yes, I suppose it is! Do you want to come down from there?”
“Isn’t that obvious too?”
“Sorry! Silly question! You wouldn’t know how to come down from there, would you?”

“Don’t you think I would have, long ago, if I had?”
“Sorry! Another silly question!”
“You are full of silly questions, Mister Prince!”

“Yes, yes, I know. Well, could you maybe tell me what my brothers did when they came here?”

“They both jumped in and started slaying dragons until they became overpowered and had to back off.”


“Well then. I will have to think of something a little more intellectual.”
I led my horse away from the tower and sat down on a smallish rock. I stared unseeing at the ground as I tried to think how I could get rid of the dragons. I thought of distractions, of explosions, and of being invisible. Oh, and of returning back home. But none of these ideas helped at all with a really good idea. Then my fingers touched the three wishing stones still in my pocket. As I fingered them absentmindedly, an idea slowly began to form. Hmm… creating a distraction…

As it was getting dark, I set up camp for the night, and then went to sleep.
The following morning, I was all set to make a start on my plan. I would use one of my wishing stones to create a large, inviting, animal carcass about a mile from the tower. Then all the dragons would flock there at the invitation of the meat. And that would leave the tower unprotected. But before I started using the wishing stones, I decided to first check how hostile this infestation of dragons really was. Maybe it was all just a lie. Maybe they would just let me walk in the door. I guess I was hoping to get this over and done with, without going to a lot of trouble. So I went and circled the tower until I could see the front door underneath all the writhing bodies. So far, none of the dragons were batting an eye at me. I carefully stepped forward and put my hand in between the dragons onto the doorknob. The closest little dragon lifted up its head to glare balefully at me. As I turned the doorknob, more of the dragons in the vicinity turned to look at me and bared their teeth, growling at me. One or two of them started to move closer, and the closest one bunched their muscles to spring. When I did not remove my hand from the doorknob, one of them sprung onto my wrist and dug in its claws. Needless to say, I hurriedly let go of the knob, sprang back, shaking my hand frantically in an attempt to dislodge the little dragon. I started running – just running to get away, still hopping and twirling to get rid of the dragon. Then, after I had gone a little way, I heard laughter from up in the tower. I turned to look up and saw it was the princess, leaning out of her window and laughing at my predicament. This made me freeze. She seemed so joyful about my failure. At that moment, I finally manage to dislodge the dragon and tossed it away, stalking off in the other direction.

The wounds on my wrist were not nearly as important to me as my hurt feelings. Now was the time to do something and fast. I had to get that condescending princess out of that tower as fast as possible and away at the speed of light. I continued marching, kicking at the tufts of grass. Then I drew the bag with the wishing stones out of my pocket and poured them out of my palm. I knew, of course, how to use wishing stones, but I had never actually used them before. What you did was stand with the stone held in your right palm, then you turned round clockwise 3 three times, and then 3 times widdershins. Then you threw the stone over your left shoulder and made your wish. When I had walked far enough from the tower, I performed this ritual. And said, “I wish for some food source that will be attractive to the dragons from yon tower.” Afterwards, I put myself some distance away rather speedily. And waited. And waited.

Finally I risked a look to see whether the dragons were coming. But no. Far away, I could still see the tower – the tower which was still covered in a writing mass of bodies. They did not seem to have any ideas to inspect the heap of rotting meat behind me. They still clung to the tower. I took the other two stones out of my pocket and deliberated. Had my wish been specific enough? Probably not. I had not wished that the dragons would find the food more enticing than that tower. As I looked at the tower, I could see the princess at her window again. No way! I would not fail!

I dumped the second wishing stone into my palm and repeated the ritual, this time saying “I wish that the dragons would be highly attracted to that meat, come to feed on it, and stay there for a long time.”

Scarcely had I said that or I could see a cloud rising from the distant tower. I could hear the snap of thousands of wings. And then the dragons were at the meat. It was not a pretty sight and not something that I will venture to describe. I started running back towards the tower for I was not sure how long the decoy would keep the dragons occupied. I wrenched open the front door and ran up the spiral stairs two at a time. Before I knew it, I was in the princess’s room. She was backed up against the window, staring at me.

“How did you manage that?” she stammered.
“Come, we have no time,” I snapped brusquely. I was not feeling very friendly towards her.

In retrospect, I wish that I had been less hasty, and had spent more time just looking at her. She was just the kind of beautiful woman that you would like to lock up in a tower so that you always just stay to appreciate her. But at that time, all of her charm just went past me.

“But then I will have to pack a few things!” She was still stammering. “I mean, I mean, I wasn’t ready for this!”

“Then just come!”
She scurried around, grabbing here, leaving there. Then she was at my side. “You wanted to get out, my lady?” I made an attempt to be gallant.

“Yes, I want to get out. I want to go with you to your kingdom.”
“Alright, but I warn you: I am no prince.”
“No prince?” she gasped.
“Oh, my blood is princely, but I do not wish for the lifestyle of a prince.”
“Oh.” She looked at me doubtfully.
Once again, I moved fast. I helped her down the spiral stairs as fast as possible and over the tufts of grass to where my horse was tethered.

“You can ride on the horse,” I said, helping her up. “I will walk.”
She slid onto the horse’s back in her blue dress, almost lying flat against the creature’s neck, and worked her hands into its mane. “It feels so good to be out of that tower,” she whispered. “You have no idea how good it is to feel a living creature again. You just have no idea.” She rallied a little. “But are you going to walk all the way back to your kingdom?”

“No,” I said. “I have another idea.” This idea had come to me when I took her down the tower. “I think this is why my father gave me the wishing stones. And I still have one left.”

Then, keeping one hand on the horse’s bridle, and performing the – by now – familiar ritual, I wished to go home.